He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
The air taste purple.
Randomize
