Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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