Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
