i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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