I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
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