He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
