Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
