I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
