i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
