I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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