Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
