I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
