Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
i think my mom watched the whole time
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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