dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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