What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
