What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He passed out mid-signature
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Randomize
