just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
