It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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