It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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