Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
