let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
