when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Randomize
