They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
