problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
