Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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