I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
