In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
