He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
