Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
God, you're like boner-b-gone
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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