"it" just moved
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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