chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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