A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Randomize
