Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize