Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
