Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
