This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
