Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
