i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
