Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Randomize
