He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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