So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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