i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Randomize
