Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
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