I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
