that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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