just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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