grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
