when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
