i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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