This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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